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How To Work From Home

19 Jun

Just a little somethin’ somethin’ I wrote on The Official How To Blog. Now you too can look uber professional while wearing a Whitesnake T-shirt, and pants with a rip in the inner thigh.

The Official How To Blog

Thinking about working from home? Take this short quiz to find out if it’s for you:

  • Do you want to work from home?

If you’ve answered ‘yes’ to any of the above questions, then working remotely is right for you. The following steps will help you find success in the virtual work world.

Step 1. Convince your employer it’s a good idea to let you work from home

Most people make the mistake of giving a presentation showcasing why working remotely is more productive than working in an office setting. All this does is convince your boss you hate her by forcing her to lose minutes of her life listening to your boring pitch. I prefer the Liability Method wherein you sprain your thumb in a freak copier accident, or sexually harass yourself in front of others. Legal will be more than happy to keep their “lawsuit on legs” out…

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How-to: Suckage Revisited

3 Nov

NaNoWriNO Day 3

Topic: Why are people so stupid?

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Trying to figure out why people are so stupid is like trying to figure out the meaning of life. I racked my brain, trying to factor in all cultural, gender-specific, socioeconomic and religious reasons as to why people choose to degrade themselves with doltish behavior. After several paragraphs, and shedding a lifetime’s worth of tears on my keyboard, I sounded so bitter and maniacal Ann Coulter would have been proud of me.

A little humor can even help this nightmare be more palatable

I was struggling because not only had I ingested a whole bottle of NyQuil (I was out of vodka) but also because I’m a solutions-oriented person. While I think it’s important to find out why a problem is occurring, it’s ultimately more important to fix it.

I wrote a post last year outlining simple tips on how not to suck as a person. I think this is the perfect opportunity to revisit the list, and make some additions to it. While I can’t figure out what exactly causes these facepalm moments, I can set some guidelines in an effort to reduce their occurrences in the future.

Here are 20 NEW things everyone needs to stop doing: Continue reading →

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How-to: Decipher M4W Personals

21 Sep

Last week I explored the wonderful world of W4M (woman for man) dating ads, and immediately knew that I wanted to write a follow up piece which helped women decipher the M4W (man for woman) personals. I didn’t think this would prove to be nearly as entertaining because, well, the ladies were stretching the truth more than politicians during election season.

I’m woman enough to admit I was wrong. Very, very wrong. It seems that the entire dating world is infected with a disease which makes people incapable of telling the truths about themselves. The men, just like the women, were unable to avoid catching the bug. Continue reading →

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How-to: Decipher W4M Personals

14 Sep

Credit: Craigslist

Last week I wrote about breakups, and the bad behavior which sometimes ensues as a result of them. So what happens to these people when they finally decide to put the pieces of their lives back together again? Well, they get back in the saddle and start dating again.

It used to be that you had to meet people at bars, parties, school, church, blind dates (shudder) or even through friends. Some people chose to commit career suicide and date someone from work. Nowadays there are so many more options for single people: speed dating, singles cruises, matchmaking services, volunteering, support groups or even the internet.

Meeting people on the internet is a completely viable option in my opinion. We connect with old friends that way. We network for new jobs that way. We go shopping that way. Why can’t we find a mate that way? I think people are hesitant because the internet has gotten a reputation for being the place where people take great liberty in embellishing (okay, lying) about who they really are.

Continue reading →

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How-to: Not Suck as a Person

24 Aug

Is it just me, or has there been an increase in annoying behavior lately? Everywhere I turn there are people who display behavior which makes me cringe, scratch my head, or tear my hair out. I always wonder if the offenders know they’re committing these small acts of insanity, or if it seems normal in their worlds.

So how do you know if the rest of the world looks at you and thinks, “Wow, you suck!” There are the obvious things: abusive behavior, committing criminal acts, substance abuse. Then there are the things that should be punishable offenses (why isn’t eating Spam illegal yet?) but aren’t heinous enough to make the cut.

I’ve gone to the liberty of putting together a list of 50 guidelines we can all follow (hey, I’m not excluded) which will help bring our collective “suckage quotient” down a few notches.

Continue reading →

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