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Open Letter: Female GOP Supporters

4 Nov

NaNoWriNO Day 4

Topic: Open letter to the GOP

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Female GOP Supporters:

As you know, elections are right around the corner, and propaganda information from both parties has been spreading like wildfire for the past several months. As we close in on November 6th, I can’t help but think about those of you ladies who will be going to the polls and placing a mark next to Romney’s name. As someone who considers herself moderately conservative, I can appreciate wanting to elect someone who can actually make change happen rather than use it as a buzzword to slap on a bumper sticker.

However, I’m just not sure how any woman could choose to vote Republican in this election. Don’t get me wrong, the idea of President Obama serving another four years doesn’t exactly get me super excited, but I find the alternative to be much worse. “But Jen, as a moderate conservative, don’t you want someone who sits on the same side of the fence you’re on?” No, and let me tell you why. Continue reading

Open Letter: Bristol Palin

2 Aug

Dear Bristol Palin,

We need to have a talk, woman to woman. Now, I’m normally not one to get into the lives of politicians’ children because it’s cruel to take shots at people who were thrust into the public eye, but you’re a different story. Ever since your family rode in to the political picture you’ve been chasing the spotlight, and it’s high time you exited stage left.

You recently took it upon yourself to pen a memoir which, I have to be honest, sort of surprised me. I didn’t know anyone in your family was fully literate let alone knew what the word memoir meant. I guess stranger things have happened. You know, like Rebecca Black’s success.

I pride myself on being a fair person so I put aside all of my preconceived notions about you, and read some of the excerpts from your book which were posted online. My mind was blown by the juicy tidbits about your life….because I put a gun to it and pulled the trigger. Only sweet, merciful death could release me from the banality of your drivel.

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Open Letter: Hipsters

28 Jun

Dear Hipsters,

I used to be really fond of you guys. I thought your love of vinyl records was pretty cool. When you brought back wayfarers I shouted with joy. I appreciated your efforts to inform others about the importance of recycling. I adored that you rocked Chucks, my footwear of choice.

Then, somewhere along the way, you became annoying. We’re not talking about the kind of annoying where I can count to ten and go to my happy place. It’s not the type of annoying where you go for a short walk and all is forgotten. I’m talking about the kind of annoying that makes a person want to punch unicorns in the face.

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