Man oh man, am I excited about this week’s troublemaker. She’s one of the first people I met on WordPress, and she’s still one of my favorites. Have you ever met someone you were convinced was your sister from a different mister because you are that much alike? That’s how I feel about this Team Tonic Troublemaker.
Things we have in common:
- We both kill plants (even a cactus)
- We both like to destroy our livers with lots of booze
- We are both named Jen
- We both love Ikea
- We both love the idea of taking a bath, but get bored once we’re in the tub
- We both love talking about eating
- We are both so sexy that our faces are illegal in 82 countries
Without further ado, I’d like you to introduce you to the real thunder from down under. Her name is Jen, and you can find her over at The Modern Woman’s Society. She’s an insanely cool blogger, and you’d benefit from checking out her site. She talks about liquor, food, life lessons, and she also takes the most amazing photos. Do your life a favor and go read her posts.
She packed her bags, and made the long journey to the Pacific Northwest so we could hang out for bit. I’ve got to be honest, the Portland area hasn’t been the same since.
It was hot out so we bought Slurpees. She had trouble understanding the sizes because America is lame and measures things in ounces:
My friend Steven kept hitting on her when we went out to dinner. I told him she was married, but her animal magnetism was too much for him:
She wanted to experience American cuisine at its finest, so I bought her some FREEDOM FRIES:
We had a mustache growing contest which she won. I could only grow a Pervert Mustache, but she rocked that full handlebar like a champion:
After one too many drinks, we put on a talent show for the rest of the bar patrons. This is us during our Salt-N-Pepa “Shoop” performance:
I promised her I’d eat Vegemite (a.k.a. the food of the devil) to make her feel at home, but it was out of stock. THANK GOD:
She had been trying to convince me to become infected with a case of the babies, and this was her subtle way of hinting at it. Sorry darling, but as I’ve said here, my ovaries are out of order:
Thanks for coming to visit me! You know I love you to pieces, and you’re welcome back anytime.
If YOU would like to be a Team Tonic Troublemaker, please e-mail me at: firstname.lastname@example.org. I promise I don’t bite…unless you’re into that sort of thing.