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You’ve Got Mail

11 Feb

Have you ever wondered what your mail would say about you? I never gave it any thought until I started receiving mail for someone who used to live in my apartment. When we first moved in I expected there to be some overlap, but we are still regularly receiving mail for a person who hasn’t lived here for nearly a year. Just when I think it has finally stopped, I find an invitation to a college alumni event for a university in Tennessee in my mailbox.

Who is this person who had to leave in such a hurry that she couldn’t submit a change of address form to the postal service? Was she a fugitive running from the long arm of the law? Was she a model who suddenly left for a career-making photo shoot? Was she someone who was turned on by the thought of strangers rifling through her mail? I tried looking her up on Facebook, but unlike me, she has a life which is not consumed by hours of social media interaction.

So I put on my detective hat, and looked at the evidence.

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Sippin’ on Some Tonic

30 Jan

Credit: "Cheetah" by Jen and Tonic

Awhile back on my Facebook Fan Page I asked my fans if they’d be interested in having me get drunk and take to my computer to write a post for my blog. I was surprised to see that so many people fully supported this idea. Apparently I have fans who are either: (1) alcoholics or (2) people who like to see me humiliate myself or (3) a combination of the two. Whichever category you fit into, I love each and every one of you.

So this weekend I did the classiest thing I can think of, and got drunk by myself. Prior to sipping on $2 Pinot Grigio (again, classy) I was expecting that I’d have a full manifesto completed by the end of the night. Considering I didn’t even have the energy to turn my computer on, that didn’t happen. Thankfully, I had my notebook with me and was able to jot down a few things before passing out.

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